Code of Conduct
Our Intention is to:
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Foster mutual respect, appreciation, and value for all members of the Neo Tango community.
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Support the practice of Neo Tango Dance in a consent-based culture.
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Allow everyone to have a safe, fun, and responsible dance and social experience.
Our Neo Tango events are inclusive. All genders, races, and ethnic backgrounds are welcome.
The organizers, hosts and staff are here to help you have an enjoyable experience. Please bring inappropriate actions that are personally experienced or observed to our attention immediately. We have a zero tolerance policy for any harassment against marginalized people.
Topics Covered:
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Relational and Social Considerations
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Embrace
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Dance Safety and Floorcraft
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Asking Someone to Dance
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Caring for the Space
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Promoting Your Boundaries
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What Constitutes Harassment
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Boundary, Consent and Safety Accidents and Violations Protocol
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Automatic Bans
Relational and Social Considerations:
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Dancers will be courteous to fellow attendees regardless of dance ability, gender, gender identity and expression, sexual orientation, physical disability, physical appearance, race, age, religion or any other characteristic or trait.
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Positive feedback for DJs, instructors, organizers, staff, and dancers is encouraged. While negative feedback is also welcome, please do so either in person or through the Our Neo Tango events Comment Box in a manner that is constructive and respectful of the person receiving it.
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Social dances are an opportunity to enjoy dancing with people of many different levels and dance backgrounds and it is not the place to offer unsolicited dance lessons or advice.
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People are free to accept and decline dances for any reason. As the requester, respect the wishes of someone who declines. Engage with dancing as a series of dance invitations, of which partners may choose to accept or reject regardless of prior choices.
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Care for your personal hygiene. Bring extra clothing and personal hygiene products to ensure you look and smell clean (and dry). Limit use of strong smelling natural and artificial perfumes, deodorants and colognes.
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Non-consensual pokes, kisses, tickles, caresses, massages, or pats while dancing or passing by someone are not appropriate. An example of a non-consensual pass-by touch would be coming up to a person from behind (i.e. they can’t see who you are and haven’t given you consent to touch them) and tickling their lower back.
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If taking photographs use respectful visual media practices. Take notice of subtle cues dancers may give when you take photos. Do not use a flash and be aware of ‘taking space’ on the dance floor. Respect the requests of participants and delete any content, for any reason offered, if asked to do so by the subject.
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Excessive kissing, touching, or sexual behavior is not acceptable at Our Neo Tango events. If you are making out on the premise, the host may remind you of the above, and may at their discretion ask you to leave.
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Use of intoxicants in the venue is not tolerated. Arriving to Our Neo Tango events under the obvious influence of alcohol or drugs is not acceptable you may be asked to leave until you are sober. Repeated violations will result in suspension or banning from Our Neo Tango events.
The In’s and Out’s of the Abrazo:
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Never force your partner into close embrace. This goes for both leads and follows! The embrace, whether open or closed, should be relaxed and comfortable for both people. If either person wanted to exit close embrace it should be easy to do because their partner is not constricting them.
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Never touch someone on their breasts, hips, butt, or genitals. If you accidentally graze someone somewhere sensitive, acknowledge it, apologize and be more careful in the future.
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While exploring themes of intimacy/sensuality are acceptable during a dance this is only appropriate with consenting partners. Be aware that your embrace not be overly intimate until you have established rapport and consent. Examples of an intimate embrace would be hands low on your partner’s back or hips, holding or caressing the back of your partner’s neck, cheek to cheek, or any face to face contact, holding your partner’s hand on your chest, and an overly ‘huggy’ embrace that limits your partner’s ability to open the embrace if they want to. Note that you may see someone dancing more intimately with another person. This does not mean that is how they choose to dance with other people. Each partnership is unique and must be approached freshly every time.
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We are all humans and sometimes you may notice yourself becoming sexually aroused during a dance. We ask that in these circumstances that you do not pursue this arousal in a dance. Please keep your erogenous body parts to yourself and if you do become aroused be very aware of how you are dancing with and touching your partner. Our Neo Tango events is a safe place for everyone to dance, not a place to find sexual partners.
Dance Safety and Floorcraft:
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Consider the safety of your dancing at all times. Both leaders and followers are responsible for floorcraft.
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Do not attempt dance moves (such as big boleoés and voleo’s or overly large movements) under conditions that are potentially dangerous to your partnership or the surrounding dancers.
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Be aware of your and your partner’s skill level, rapport, and fatigue when executing dance moves with an increased risk of physical injury to yourselves or others.
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Do not “muscle” partners into moves or throw your weight around.
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Do not grab or lock another dancer into a position that compromises their mobility.
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Do your best not to step on, bump, or trip other dancers. Be gracious and apologize if a collision happens.
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Be respectful of the dance floor and the space people dance in. Do your best to not stand on the dance floor and monitor the volume of your conversations near the dance floor.
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When the dance floor is crowded be aware of how much space you are taking up in relation to the other couples around you. Hogging space isn’t nice. Dips and lifts are not advised when the floor is crowded.
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We dance Neo Tango, but we respect Tango circulation rules. If you don’t dance Tango, and if there is enough space for that, please dance in the center. In any case pay extreme attention as to not disturbing other Neo Tango dancers.
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Our Neo Tango events will suspend/ban dancers for dancing that is dangerous or causes harm.
Asking Someone to Dance:
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It is no problem to use traditionnal Tango Cabeceo invitation method (eye contact) for whoever is confortable with it, but it should no be an obligation, and general invitation terms stated below should also be considered as valid for inviting/be invited by somebody in our neo Tango events.
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Anyone can ask anyone to dance and we recommend being proactive in approaching potential partners.
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Our Neo Tango events supports the idea that dance roles (lead and follow) are not tied to gender and that people can dance in whichever role they choose. We encourage all dancers to avoid assumptions regarding dance roles and to check in with their partners about their preferred role.
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There are many ways to ask someone to dance, be nice, be courteous, and allow space for a response of, “no, thank you”
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A good way to approach someone for a dance is from the front and to make eye contact first. If the person avoids your eye contact that is possibly a nonverbal ‘no.’
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Once eye contact has been made (not essential, but a good start) you can ask them verbally. “Would you like to dance?” or “Would you like to lead/follow a dance?”
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Holding your hand out to ask someone to dance has become a controversial method. If done well, it feels like an invitation, if done poorly it can feel invasive. When using a hand gesture, keep your hand closer to your person and don’t invade someone’s personal space.
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Do not ask someone to dance by grabbing/touching them on any part of their body.
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Neo tango does not have tanda’s, so there is no social obligation to dance 3 or 4 dances in a row. If you enjoyed a dance with someone you can immediately ask for another dance, but a simple ‘no thank you’ or “thank you” will end your dance partnership for that time.
Caring for the space:
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You will conduct yourself in a respectful and responsible manner, clean up after yourself, and cooperate with Our Neo Tango events Staff and instructors.
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You will abide by all rules and ordinances concerning Our Neo Tango events
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The dance takes considerable time, effort, and cost to operate. Not paying for your evening is freeloading on other dancers and won’t be tolerated and result in suspension or banning
Promoting Your Boundaries:
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You are encouraged to inform your dance partner if something they do or say makes you uncomfortable, physically hurts or feels unsafe. If you have a negative experience, we encourage you to deal with the problem directly by first communicating clearly with those involved and setting firm boundaries. Culturally, we differentiate this from ‘teaching’ on the dance floor by considering if your well-being is compromised through the interaction. If a situation persists please notify a host or organizer.
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You have the right to accept or refuse any dance without needing to give a reason or apology. A “No thank you” is sufficient.
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You may end a dance whenever you want, even if it has only lasted a minute (i.e. a simple ‘thank you for the dance’ and exit or you may just exit if the situation feels uncomfortable or threatening.)
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Learn non-verbal techniques to avoid dancing in close embrace or being lifted/dipped etc. so that you have greater control over the kind of dance you want
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Move to verbal feedback whenever if nonverbal cues are not working.
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Speak with the organizing team to learn how to assert your boundaries or if you have concerns with someone respecting your boundaries. We’re happy to listen, give advice, and/or help to resolve a challenging situation.
What Constitutes Harassment:
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Harassment including, but not limited to, verbal comments, intimidation, unwelcome messages, emails, or phone calls, unwelcome photography or recording, physical violence, stalking, inappropriate physical contact, and unwelcome sexual attention are not tolerated at Our Neo Tango events.
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Our Neo Tango events participants will strictly respect the physical and personal boundaries of fellow attendees on and off the dance floor. You will immediately respect any boundary/request that you stop doing something that is making someone feel uncomfortable physically or psychologically.
Boundary, Consent and Safety Accidents, and Violations Protocol:
On behalf of the Our Neo Tango events organizers, staff, and other participants, we appreciate your assistance in keeping our events and venues safe and enjoyable for everyone.
Any violations of these Agreements can be reported in person to a Our Neo Tango events organizer, staff member, or via mailing sent to thierry.baileul@gmail.com. If a participant engages in harassing or unsafe behavior, the event host(s) may take any action they deem appropriate, including, but not limited to, warning the offender, suspension, banning, and/or expulsion from the event with no refund.
In Summary, behavior that is not allowed:
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Disrespectful comments or actions against another person
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Overtly sexual words or actions, even among consenting romantic partners
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Any action that put others safety at risk on or off the dance floor.
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Any action or words that are disrespectful of another person’s stated boundaries.
The process begins when 1) we receive a complaint about a participant. AND/OR 2) are informed by dancer of a person demonstrating inappropriate or dangerous behaviour. AND/OR 3) we, ourselves, notice inappropriate or dangerous behavior.
The process continues with Inquiry into what happened. Using our Code of Conduct as a guide, we determine which specific boundaries have been crossed. Calling-in: If a Neo Tango events guideline/s can be identified that has been crossed, a calling-in process begins. This involves: a) Telling the person what boundaries have been crossed in manner that involves giving the person time to speak and reflect. b) Creating a plan together that both protects the community and supports the person in learning to respect the boundaries they have crossed.
It’s important that the person receiving feedback during this process be willing to hear and understand the feedback, even if their experience was different. Emotional abuse of the hosts or the reporters is a way to escalate the problem quickly.
Calling-out: In cases where Our Neo Tango events determines, using reasonable judgment, that there is an immediate or persistent danger to the community, or if the calling-in doesn’t work, Our Neo Tango events may move to a suspension or ban.
a) A person who is banned may ask for an arbitrator to facilitate a discussion between them and Our Neo Tango events.
b) The person in question may appeal their ban when a minimum of six months has passed. Dance access may be reinstated (sometimes with conditions) if we think that a self-growth process has occurred in regards to their behavior. In these cases we move back to step b) of the calling-in process (i.e. together coming up with a plan).
In cases where suspensions and bans need to be enforced, We may make a request of the reporter to document their experiences in writing so that we keep a record.
Automatic Bans
If you have a police report against you regarding a rape incident or sexual assault (regardless of where it may have occurred), or there is a restraining order against you regarding a dancer in our community, you are not welcome at Our Neo Tango events. Our Neo Tango events will continue the ban as long as the legal action is in process.
The organizers of Our Neo Tango events reserve the right to alter or change this code of conduct at any time. The organizers and hosts of Our Neo Tango events reserve the right to use any method deemed necessary to enforce provisions in this Code and remove someone for any reason.